Boundaries

A few months ago, I left a job that I loved to explore new horizons. It was a job that felt like home, and it was hard. I retreated into the comfort of familiar spaces and the company of loved ones to get used to the change, After all, seven years is a long time, but I was more than ready. I also took a few months off to think about what’s next. 

I used my time wisely. First, I caught up on Scandal, every single episode. I then went to Australia, Japan, and Spain. I saw many wonderful things and tasted many new discoveries. However, I never stopped thinking and (re)evaluating. I thought about the past, the present, and the future. I thought a lot about self worth and how I can continue to make a difference in the world. 

A clear theme that emerged was the idea of boundaries. I thought about the things in my life that I considered to be bad habits and how I can use this time to make some changes. Some of these things were quite trivial, for example, going to bed by midnight during the week and leaving my work computer at work if there are no reasons to take it home. Some were more monumental, at least for me. For example, I decided to take a break from my phone. Well, let me clarify, I decided to take a break from social media, aka all those apps that help you connect to everyone and everything. all. the. time.

Many friends laughed and joked that I wouldn’t be able to stay away. “You? The social media person? My feed would be so quiet without you.” As much as I am an advocate of the power of social media, I must say, the quiet time has been much needed. 

But, I didn’t write to discuss what boundaries I drew, or what boundaries we should draw. These decisions are personal. I’m sharing this, because I want you to know that boundaries are not for teenagers. It’s not an outdated idea that a lot of us life-loving free-spirited people look down upon sometimes. Having boundaries in our life don’t make us boring, or “square.” Superficial or not, boundaries give us an idea of where the line is and when we can confidently say no. Like Robin Thicke puts is, in this day and age, “I hate these blurred lines,” that can often cause compromise that might not be healthy for us.  

Just because some things have been habitual in our lives don’t mean that they have to continue to be habitual. Since I’ve started to draw the line somewhere, I’ve been feeling healthier about everything. I regularly eat breakfast in the morning, I wake up feeling rested, and overall, I feel less anxious. With a new job, I know it’ll be hard to stay firm on the rules that I have outlined for myself. I know that there’ll be days when I stay up until 2 am watching The Good Wife or reading a really juicy book, but hey, making good decisions are not always meant to be easy.

Where do you draw the line? 

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- Lisa

Lisa Leeboundaries